Thursday, June 17

A reply --

Got this from one of the unusually perceptive and intelligent types who actually read this blog.

"Y'know, for a less time-intensive self defence setup. How long does it take to acquire a practical knowledge of hand-to-hand chopsocky? Couple of years, yeah? Couple of weeks at the range and Bob's your (heavily armed) uncle...
# posted by Joe Crow : 3:23:16 AM"

While this is a reasonable point, I would like to emphasize that streetfighting is not a difficult skill to acquire. I can teach you enough in two or three classes to beat the snot out of your run-of-the-mill drunk college jock.

Another point to consider is that if somebody -- even several somebodies -- start slapping you around and you open fire, you'll go to prison. They call it the "rule of appropriate defense." You would also be astonished to learn how fucking hard it is to just draw a weapon once somebody has started in on you.

Finally, intelligent perceptive types usually hesitate before inflicting lethal force. That hesitation will cost you your gun or your knife, and after that, all bets are off. You're most likely dead.

First line of defense: a quality shin-kick.

Second line of defense: a good stiff jab followed by an overhand elbow.

Third line of defense (once your kick and your elbow have given you a second or two of breathing space): a can of high-quality pepper spray.



Pepper spray is great shit. I carry some myself. It can save your life -- not only against a mugger, but against a savage dog, or even a bear or a cougar (if you live out in the country, like me). And the best thing about it is this: if you're wrong -- if the guy you just shot was really only, say, asking for directions -- you can apologize, help him clean up, and go on your way.


Shoot this guy with your Glock, and this story has a different ending.

That's today's lecture on self-defense.



As far as my supposed homophobia goes, well, that's a subject for another day. Let's just say that human beings are human beings, regardless of who (or even what) they prefer to fuck.



9 comments:

Joe Crow said...

True enough, but in terms of practical self defence, don't discount the simple deterrence value of a firearm. One of the tiny benefits of America's current odd mix of hoplophobia/hoplophilia is that most folks have guns imprinted on their brain as The Boomstick Of Doom, and tend to back the fuck off if they know their target is packing. One problem with elite ninja skillz is that you have to actually use them for folks to know you've got them.

Also, on the pepper spray front, my view might be skewed since it's just about as difficult to get pepper spray here in Mass as it is to get an actual firearm. On the other hand, you can actually carry pepper spray in national parks, which you can't do with a gun.

"unusually intelligent and perceptive"...dang, now I gotta sound smart all the time...

Scott Lynch said...

"Charges of homophobia?" Christ, it isn't because of *Berne,* is it?

Mastadge said...

Hmmm. Carry a sword. It'll deter just about everyone except those few who would attack you for the sole purpose of stealing it.

Angela said...

I would prefer to stay clear of firearms and other deadly weapons. If you pull it, you gotta be prepared to use it. Hopefully I'll never be in that kind of situation.

Mastadge said...

Liri, you're right. I just like swords. Don't know how to use 'em properly, and if I kept mine properly sharpened I'd probably be more of a danger to myself than to anyone else, but I do like them.

Angela said...

I like swords too, and would most likely injure myself more. Very out of practice. I like my boken, no sharp edges but ya can wack someone with it real good. :) I'd rather carry a blade than a gun any day.

Bob said...

The thing about guns is, most people haven't a clue how to use one, tactically speaking. It's just as much a martial art as Karate, in some ways, but you get these wannabe cowboys who pick up a firearm and fail to understand that they hold, not a surrogate penis in their hands, but Death itself. I carry, on occasion. I do so only when I feel it prudent to do so. I've also been trained by the armorer of SEAL Team 3 and I used to train kids straight out of boot camp how to clear a room with a 1911.
As for anyone else who might be thinking of carrying, for the love of God, please think again. Chances are you'll end up dead from your own weapon after you realize, too late, that it's a hell of a lot harder to pull the trigger when your target's not made out of paper and hanging from a clip. Believe that.

fishi said...

My defensive strategy is to curl up like a frightened turtle.

Anonymous said...

Car keys jabbed in the eye(s) supposedly works well, but you have to get close. Throwing your wallet or purse at them, otoh, gives you a few seconds to run and scream your head off.

A man approached me while I was carrying my toddler daughter out to the car, broad daylight, in the grocery store parking lot. He was dressed nicely and was holding out a carnation to me. I didn't know him from Adam. Without thinking, I ran around the car, putting it between us, turned so my body was blocking the baby, and in a loud voice ordered him to get away from me. Turned out to be a guy campaigning for city office, but I'm glad I reacted the way I did. And I still didn't take his flower or let him get near me, even after he identified himself. You just never know.